udder chaos at dress rehearsal

Well, we held dress rehearsal for the live nativity last night. All did not go as expected, but we got thru it. Nicki from the auction barn showed up about 8:00 with a load of goats. She hit an icey patch yesterday with the truck and trailer and jackknifed the whole darn rig. She smashed out the rear windshield in the truck and took the muffler off. When she pulled in, it sounded like East Eden tractor pull for God's sake. "Nicki, how much do I owe you for the goats?"

"20 bucks Annie, it's Christmas, I'll cut you a deal. Anne by the way these goats can't be beat".

"Thanks Nick"

I handed her the 20 and she drove off.

The neighbor boys showed up with their spotlight that they use for spotlighting deer. We are going to use it for the light shining down from the star we have covered with aluminum foil and hung in the rafters of the barn. Works like a charm. There was a big fight over who would wear the jackass suit so we flipped a coin. The rest of them put the sheets on and pretended to be wise men.

I didn't realize that the sheets had Hannah Montana on them, but they will do.

I am happy to report that I will recover from the third degree burns I received on my finger tips from gluing the feathers back on Izzy's angel wings with my hot glue gun. The doctor says my fingerprints should grow back in a few years. The chickens were happy to donate the feathers I might add.

I found Mary and Joseph making out in the manger and put a quick halt to that crap.

I found the Fisher Price kareoke toy machine with the microphone in the toybox and tried to read the scene from the Peanuts movie, you know the one from the bible when the angel appears. No one could hear a word I said because the goats wouldn't shut up.

"Izzy, what in the hell did Nicki say about those goats before she left?"

"Mom. she said they were in heat!"

"Oh my God, I though she said "they couldn't be beat".

No wonder they won't shut up.

I had to take the nose ring out of Mary's nose. "I really don't think she had a nose ring". I yelled. "Anne you are so lame" I knew this was gonna be a challenge.

The other neighbor boys are busy making the sign that reads "Concert an Chautauqua Institute canceled tonight" we are replacing it with a sign that reads "Live Nativity at Anne's Farm, 5 bucks". Anyone dumb enough to pay 35 bucks to see Gordon Lightfoot will surely pay five bucks for a live nativity.

The boys down the road are ready with their flares they stole from their father's pick-up truck. We are going to put flares on the 86 and have one of the boys standing there when traffic slows down "Maam, there is a real bad accident up the road, you have to take the Stow exit, seems a milk truck has collided with a lady driving a load full of goats. You will have to go by Annie's farm, you might as well stop in to see the live nativity".

Hopefully the Sheriff's won't get wind of it. They will probably be at a Christmas party anyway.

I had Susie positioned in the barn with the box of packing peanuts I have been saving as I pick them off my living room floor from a package I got a month ago. She will throw them out of the haymow window to look like snow.

I bought 20 flashlights from the Dollar Tree yesterday for the Laser light show for the grand finale.

All went well.

Hope to see you all here tonight!!

Talk later,

Annie